How to live a good life #happiness

I’ve been recently exploring the idea of realising life purpose or calling in work that we do. Almost by accident I stumbled into this book by Jonathan Fields. It’s not about living your purpose as such but it has amazing quotes, for example:

What if you don’t so much have a passion or purpose as much as you pursue something, or a bunch of things, with passion and a sense of purpose.

It’s okay if no single spark ever rises to the level of all-consuming ‘mad passion’ or ‘life purpose’. More important is just the feeling of being sparked.


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What stands in the way becomes the way #happiness

I thought I’d share this post about the book that Linkedin VP of talent apparently gives to his colleagues – it contains great book recommendation as well as motivational one liners like the one in the headline or How you do anything is how you do everything. 

‘What stands in the way becomes the way’ is particularly a strong reframing, re-energising mantra/ formula. I applied it when dealing with a challenging situation at work and it does work – it reframes your thinking and rather than let you slump and give up energises you for achieving the end goal. Are you preventing me from achieving my goal? You say it’s impossible? Well, I am not giving up, buddy, and it’s happening either way!

It reminds me of Mark Manson’s book that I wrote about before and his idea that ‘Happiness ≠ no problems’ but rather ‘Happiness = better problems’. You need obstacles to be happy.

‘How you do anything is how you do everything’ is another powerful phrase – and a good reminder for slackers like me. Rather than spend time complaining about how your situation is so awful and looking for alternatives, maybe focus on what you are doing instead and give it 100%?

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How to be happy in marriage – appreciate the context and adjust your expectations

I am a big fan of Alain de Botton. He manages to poetically capture the essence of modern life struggles, throws a life ring of information and proposes reframing exercises to shed light on the big existential questions we seem to be stuck at.

In his deceptively titled book ‘How to think more about sex’ he gives a perfect bird’s eye view on what constitutes a successful marriage – the subject which you know interests me greatly. He nails it completely in these 4 and a bit pages (hope you can forgive my page photographing skills!)

Continue reading

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My guide to happiness – this is what it ultimately boils down to

This is a big post for me. I wanted to summarise everything I learned about happiness. I attempted to distill it to a couple of words, concepts. It took years to get here. It took some thinking, time and several versions. But ultimately this is what it boils down to for me:
I’ll expand on this later. Thoughts?

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Happy New Year!


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How to remain calm with people. It has to do with self love #happiness

I have taken a long time to learn to deal with ‘negative’ people. It took a while to understand that often the problem is not in others but in me. Alain de Botton sums it up beautifully. When dealing with ‘negative’ or annoying people, are you sure ‘negativity’ is there altogether or do you perceive it to be there? Are you sure it’s not self hatred that frames your perception of being attacked and leads to overreaction? I will treat this video as a short course on conflict management and cross it off my development plan 🙂

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The book that will be my default present this year #happiness

I have noticed this book several times before and bought it recently after it appeared on one of the happiness blogs I read and I realised I follow the author on Twitter – serendipity it is.

Reviews promised a kick up my butt and this is exactly what this book delivers – it slaps you on the face, pours a bucket of ice water over you, then tells you everything you knew about happiness is wrong (while being firmly rooted in concepts like Buddhism). I like it. I think this book is one of the most honest and view changing books on self development I’ve read.

I gave it to a friend as a present and plan to make it a default present to give in 2017. As you grapple with yearly reviews and goal setting for 2017, this book might just change your outlook. Have you read it already? What did you think? Highly recommend.

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